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A Perilous Conversation

When my mom passed, I inherited her financial advisor, a man named “B”. He’s a spry, octogenarian with a great sense of humor and a million stories (all told with undisclosed identities). He lives in the world my mom did (West Los Angeles, uber-liberal culture, although his financial advice is pretty conservative). At the tail-end of our monthly money chat, he wandered into my territory with a comment about Alabama’s recent abortion law. He said, “I think people who want to ban abortion, ought to have to support those babies.”


Try to picture me letting that statement pass without comment. Still, poking the abortion bear can end relationships. However, “B” has been without peer in improving my financial comprehension, so it seemed worth the risk. I asked for permission to enlighten him, as he had done for me, and he said, “By all means, go ahead.”


First fact: There are many more pregnancy centers than abortion clinics. There are privately supported clinics providing whatever support and resources a woman considering abortion might need — typically free. “B” had never heard of pregnancy centers.


Second Fact: Every baby, regardless of the circumstances of their conception, has the same value. Every human life is unique and irreplaceable. [I also said I am convinced that each one of us is created for a purpose, by divine design, with which he agreed.]


Third Fact: Encouraging a woman to end the life of her child rarely ever “empowers” her, but usually aids the bullies around her for whom that child would be an inconvenience. In my 20 years experience, women who have abortions (such as mine) see it as their ONLY choice, not “one choice of many.” What I mean is, a woman considering abortion has encountered what she believes is an insurmountable obstacle — typically, a lack of support from family or partner, or a belief she will not be able to get her life trajectory back if she takes the baby detour.


However, ending an innocent life for someone else’s “convenience” does damage to the fabric of our character — hers, society’s, the medical community. Not to mention the lost creativity, ingenuity and relationships cut off from that initial terminated life, plus the generations which would emanate from it.


Fourth Fact: Every baby is a wanted baby by someone. For every baby aborted, there are 20 families waiting to adopt, willing to endure tremendous expense and scrutiny to prove their worthiness.


To B’s great credit, he admitted every bit of what I said was news to him.

As our chat continued, he was shocked that he had never heard about:

  1. Convicted baby-killer masquerading as an abortion doctor, Kermit Gosnell. And that his filthy facility was not inspected for seventeen years.

  2. Planned Parenthood’s baby “chop shop,” euphemistically called “fetal tissue harvesting.” And how they were making a profit at both ends of the transaction: a fee for the abortion and then additional fees for providing research “specimens.”

  3. The verified poor recovery rates for victims of rape or incest when followed by abortion, and the conclusive evidence of emotional benefits to the victims when a birth follows either of those traumas.

  4. That almost all women who abort their first pregnancy, in the 2nd trimester, who have a familial history of breast cancer will develop breast cancer themselves — a risk significantly higher than a smoker’s risk of developing lung cancer, The abortion-breast cancer risk does not have to be legally disclosed by abortion providers.

B’s response was “I have been forming my opinions without the facts.” He was certain most people know as little as he did, and (charmingly) suggested I write a letter to the editor of the LA Times.

Somehow, I don’t think the LA Times will care or publish such a letter, but including it here might help someone else change their opinion, or initiate a similar conversation.

Still, I did promise him I would do it, so stay tuned…


from Alabama to NY, abortion is in the news

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