It is my opinion that the movie "Fifty Shades of Gray" is going to create a black sucking hole in the universe.

The trailer for the movie came on TV the other night and my darling husband ("Bear") asked me the essential question, "Do women really like being treated like that?"  As a hyper-protective one-woman man, my husband just couldn't imagine the mechanics of this kind of preference.

"All porn is homoerotic."  This startling statement is followed by a very interesting testimony from a Marine.  Click here to read his story.

I found the article thought-provoking and worthy of a discussion with my husband.  We found the concept offered a different slant on many of the issues that pop up in our relationship consultations.   

What do you think? 

I know a stunningly attractive woman who never expecting still be single in her 30s.  She ended a long term relationship that was going nowhere, leaving her wondering if her chance for motherhood had just evaporated.  
A childhood sweetheart appeared and reignited the memory of a teenage passion.  Within a short time there is a baby on the way.  Baby showers, talk of weddings, the romance of a lost-love scramble her usual good judgment.

But after the baby came, the old flame revealed his true sponging nature, and suddenly their income dwindled, unpaid bills piled up, and she found herself in a fierce legal battle for survival.

World AIDS Day was December 1st -- a few days late, but here are the FACTS.
  • Thirteen to 24 year olds account for 26% of all new HIV infections in the U.S. in 2010.(1) 
  • The most recent stats (from 212) show an INCREASED rate among 13-14 and 20-24 year olds, with rates in 15-19 year olds remaining stable.(2)
  • Men who have sex with men (MSM) account for 72% of all new HIV infections among youth.(1)
  • HIV infections among teens as a result of male/male contact increased 22% from 2008 to 2010.(1)  [Note: The Medical Institute for Sexual Health recommends that even a one-time sexual encounter with a man, whether or not the teen considers himself gay, should still be tested for HIV.]

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month so expect to see more pink ribbons and "Save the Tatas" bumperstickers.

But don't expect your healthcare provider, Planned Parenthood, the National Organization for Women or the New York Times to talk about the increased risk of breast cancer from

Maybe I'm the only one who will say it out loud, but the whole "Free Love Movement" my generation promoted in the 60's and 70's seems to have produced at least two generations after us who are unlikely to have what it takes to be in a lifelong commitment.

The most common reasons for "singleness," (meaning NOT MARRIED) among young people are, "I'm not ready to settle down."  "I'm really focused on getting established in my chosen field."  "I'm not ready to have sex with just one person for the rest of my life."

The most common reasons for singleness among the more mature are the same but different.  "I haven't found anyone I want to marry."  "All the good ones are taken."  "Most people my age have a lot of baggage."  

Am I the only one who notices that the reasons for singleness as a young person are the CAUSE of singleness in the more mature?  Just sayin'. 

I’m sure you’ve heard the slogan, “Be safe, use protection!” Yeah, but what if safe doesn’t mean what you think it means?

Using a condom is a little like getting into a small enclosed space with a bag of BEES.  As long as the bag doesn’t break, leak, tear or get a hole in it, you won’t get stung.  All you gotta do is make sure the bees stay in the bag.  But what if, while you're focused on the bees in the bag, there's SPIDERS under the shelf just waiting until you get close enough to crawl on?!  Or what if you're so focused on the bees, you don’t even notice the army of ants marching up your pantleg!

That's exactly what you're doing when you trust a condom.

Sometimes online pornography starts out as "just a distraction" or "harmless entertainment," but it can become something else. When it starts interfering with work or school or relationships, you know it's a problem. 

Pornographic images imprint in the mind, and they will always be there, even when you wish they weren't. Getting out of the porn pit can be really difficult, but that doesn't mean it can't be done.

If you or someone you care about is struggling with porn, this book has very practical information on how to break free.  But let me be clear: this is for people who have determined their porn-use is a problem, not to convince someone they have a problem.

This Is Your Brain on Porn is available for purchase starting 9/1/2014.  If you are interested, click here. 

The AskMen.com Great Male Survey is done online in the UK, Canada, USA and Australia. The survey is instructive, because it reminds me that information doesn't change behavior, only processed information does.  What I mean is, a person can have any number of facts floating around in their head but they don't all have relevance.

This survey is a case in point.  Women can READ the data (the surveys are posted here) but still not fully appreciate how the information revealed in the survey could have a profound impact on their behavior.

For instance, men were asked, "How often do you get tested for STDs?"  Fifty-three percent (53%) said NEVER.  Then they were asked, "Which aspect of your sex life have you lied about?" And fifty one percent (51%) said "The number of partners I've had."

If you are a sexually active woman that should make you stop and think. Just those two responses tell you, there is a 50/50 chance that your new prospective partner will lie about the number of partners he's had, and no matter what he SAYS, he has no idea if he is infected or not (most STDs are asymptomatic especially in males.)